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need lil help here.

im not exactly an empath. its trivial when the time comes to be sympathetic/empathetic.

for me its walking away from it and letting my mind run giving some thought helps me figure out how i feel about things...

who am i kiddin, i cant speak from my heart for the life of me on the spot.

out of touch or heartless?

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Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last four (4) days.
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life, heart, touch, spot, heartless
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Electric
BA1
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First, I'm not gonna be able to "help" you because I really don't see much wrong when it comes to perspective.
But, I have to point out some differences. There is a difference between being an 'empath' and being empathetic. They're not the same. And sympathy is a completely different animal.

A situation presents itself to us and we process the results differently. Some people process it with emotion, others process it with logic.

You seem to be the latter. You don't seem to be heartless or out of touch.
Often times, emotionally based people (usually in groups) expect others to respond in the same manner as they do and that's when ****shit starts to get awkward.
"Ca'mon....just let it out, it's okay to cry -" and all that bullshit, and if you can't fake it well enough, then you're a heartless asshole.

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Jetmoo
last online: 05/03, 21:17
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Maybe you take longer to process information and longer to process and understand what your feelings are.

In the past I have struggled to understand my feelings and I didn’t know how best to react so I waited until I understood what my feelings were and what had triggered them. I think mostly I recognise what my feelings are but my poorly brain doesn’t help.

Some people have a hard time understanding their feelings for various reasons. That doesn’t make you heartless.

I’m often very sensitive to others emotions and I can sort of soak them up like a sponge but I try really hard now to take a break and have time to think about it instead of responding based on emotions.

When emotional we can say things that we don’t mean and hurt people and feel guilty regret for it. And people tend to sometimes mirror others emotions some times.

Sometimes it’s best to have time to process the situation and take time to consider the best way to deal with the situation before approaching the situation.

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Jetmoo
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@BA1 what do you think the differences are when it comes to being an empath versus being empathic?

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Jetmoo
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When u spent time thinking about it, can u later speak from the heart about it?

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Anonymous
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(22 hours after post)
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most definitely, after some time i think it thoroughly and come to my senses.

but it always feels like i " figured out " how i feel .. not by acting on what i feel .. usually i have a blocked sense of emotion at first when it comes to situations.

i just feel like i should get better at expressing my emotion and its hard enough to " be real " cuz i dont want to say something simmilar to ..

" im sorry .. i dont feel bad about your sad situation right now, so let me wander off and think about it .. then i'll come back to you with a much corrected sensitive answer..boob boop "

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Jetmoo
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I think I understand y know. Sometimes I feel emotion at the time whatever it is is happening. But then other times my emotion is just not there.

Someone could say to me, my mam died. And inside it could feel like.. I brought some bread from the shop. Like.. that’s nice.. no big deal type thing. But on the inside I’ve known that logically it is a really sad situation and to try and say the right words. I’m sorry for what you are going through. Is there anything I can do to help you?

I think that for myself personally, I think I go abit numb sometimes.

I can switch between being very deeply affected by what the other person is feeling to then at times feeling numb and empty.

But not feeling emotions at the time when the situation is happening could be from a few things.
When someone is feeling very depressed/anxious/stressed they can end up in a state of dissociation or derealisation.

Cognition difficulties might affect your understanding of your feelings if you process and understand information slowly.

Some people with autism have a hard time recognising their emotions and might have a very limited understanding of what emotions they feel. It might take them longer to understand their feelings.

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Jetmoo
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Oxytocin is the love and empathy hormone. Those with iodine (as potassium iodate) deficiency may not make enough oxytocin.

Oxytocin is what helps to bond people. Like when you hug someone you love and feel all warm loved up and fuzzy. That’s oxytocin being released. Oxytocin is also responsible for “those feelings” of intimate relationships.

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Jetmoo
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I read that the nerve cells in the brain (probably everywhere actually) are covered in something called myelin sheath. If the myelin sheath is damaged or not working right then this can lead to feelings of altered perception of reality. That can affect ones emotions I think. If they feel disconnected to the world around them or disconnected from others.

But I dunno if this relevant to you.

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Jetmoo
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Do you have any illnesses or disabilities?

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Original Poster
Anonymous
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(1 day after post)
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booze, cigs and rock n roll. if that helps.

Electric
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Jetmoo wrote:
@BA1 what do you think the differences are when it comes to being an empath versus being empathic?

To an extent, an Empath absorbs or "takes on" the emotions of another. Call it an emotional mirror to an extent.
Being empathetic, however, is just a matter of consideration of how another person feels according to the circumstances.

Littenick
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It's not that you're heartless but maybe you have had enough crap going on in your life that you don't want anymore.

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Jetmoo
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Slash wrote:

Jetmoo wrote:
@BA1 what do you think the differences are when it comes to being an empath versus being empathic?

To an extent, an Empath absorbs or "takes on" the emotions of another. Call it an emotional mirror to an extent.
Being empathetic, however, is just a matter of consideration of how another person feels according to the circumstances.

Thank you. I think I might be an empath

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