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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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TRIGGER (since my friend said i shud use trigger warnings n whatever..)


The day when i can have my hair brushed, teeth brushed, clean knickers and wear clouthes will be a magical day.

Until then i have
unwashed hair since over a year ago,
acne scars all of my face, neck, back, chest, arms, legs and a lovely spot on my privates,
aswell as spots and scabs,
Legs hairier than my dads,
Hairy pits,
Mountains of dead skin including in scalp,
Some mattered hair still remains,
Privates washed twice in one year,
No bedbath since 2018.
No bath since 2017.
No spending one day in sittingroom or wearing clothes since jan 2018,
No going outside since 2017,
And now my teeth are getting white lines where they meet the gums and i may be getting a hole,
Amongst my weight loss and sleep reversal and cognition being super ****
And period blood on my bedding,
With feet unwashed that have stepped through urinated carpet and contaminated my bedding
And carpet cleaner to clean where commode spilt wee n blood. A small sponge scrub is not enough.

The day that dr dickhead and other dickheads decide to help me get more care hours will be the day the world rains rainbows sprinkles and cupcakes. I am in need of a good cupcake. Just to rot the teeth some more...

Perhaps by the time it rains cupcakes and sprinkles some of my unwell family will also have died like my 2 friends who have died in my absence.

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Since writing this post Jetmoo may have helped people, but has not within the last four (4) days.
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day, hair, hairy, pits, brushed
Replies (18)
Jetmoo edited this post .

The day when i can have my hair brushed, teeth brushed, clean knickers and wear clouthes will be a magical day.¬ ¬ Until then i have¬ unwashed hair since over a year ago, ¬ acne scars all of my face, neck, back, chest, arms, legs and a lovely spot on my privates,¬ aswell as spots and scabs,¬ Legs hairier than my dads,¬ Hairy pits...,¬ Mountains of dead skin including in scalp,¬ Some mattered hair still remains,¬ Privates washed twice in one year,¬ No bedbath since 2018.¬ No bath since 2017.¬ No spending one day in sittingroom or wearing clothes since jan 2018,¬ No going outside since 2017,¬ And now my teeth are getting white lines where they meet the gums and i may be getting a hole,¬ Amongst my weight loss and sleep reversal and cognition being super ****¬ A¬ ¬ The day that dr dickhead and other dickheads decide to help me will be the day the world rains rainbows sprinkles and cupcakes. I am in need of a good cupcake. Just to rot the teeth some more.¬ ¬ Perhaps by the time it rains cupcakes and sprinkles my family will have died like my 2 friends who have died in my absence.

Jetmoo edited this post .

The day when i can have my hair brushed, teeth brushed, clean knickers and wear clouthes will be a magical day.¬ ¬ Until then i have¬ unwashed hair since over a year ago, ¬ acne scars all of my face, neck, back, chest, arms, legs and a lovely spot on my privates,¬ aswell as spots and scabs,¬ Legs hairier than my dads,¬ Hairy pits,¬ Mountains of dead skin including in scalp,¬ Some mattered hair still remains,¬ Privates washed twice in one year,¬ No bedbath since 2018.¬ No bath since 2017.¬ No spending one day in sittingroom or wearing clothes since jan 2018,¬ No going outside since 2017,¬ And now my teeth are getting white lines where they meet the gums and i may be getting a hole,¬ Amongst my weight loss and sleep reversal and cognition being super ****¬ AAnd period blood on my bedding, ¬ With feet unwashed that have stepped through urinated carpet and contaminated my bedding¬ ¬ The day that dr dickhead and other dickheads decide to help me get more care hours will be the day the world rains rainbows sprinkles and cupcakes. I am in need of a good cupcake. Just to rot the teeth some more.¬ ¬ ...¬ ¬ Perhaps by the time it rains cupcakes and sprinkles some of my unwell family will have died like my 2 friends who have died in my absence.

Jetmoo edited this post .

The day when i can have my hair brushed, teeth brushed, clean knickers and wear clouthes will be a magical day.¬ ¬ Until then i have¬ unwashed hair since over a year ago, ¬ acne scars all of my face, neck, back, chest, arms, legs and a lovely spot on my privates,¬ aswell as spots and scabs,¬ Legs hairier than my dads,¬ Hairy pits,¬ Mountains of dead skin including in scalp,¬ Some mattered hair still remains,¬ Privates washed twice in one year,¬ No bedbath since 2018.¬ No bath since 2017.¬ No spending one day in sittingroom or wearing clothes since jan 2018,¬ No going outside since 2017,¬ And now my teeth are getting white lines where they meet the gums and i may be getting a hole,¬ Amongst my weight loss and sleep reversal and cognition being super ****¬ And period blood on my bedding, ¬ With feet unwashed that have stepped through urinated carpet and contaminated my bedding¬ ¬ ¬ And carpet cleaner to clean where commode spilt wee n blood. A small sponge scrub is not enough.¬ ¬ The day that dr dickhead and other dickheads decide to help me get more care hours will be the day the world rains rainbows sprinkles and cupcakes. I am in need of a good cupcake. Just to rot the teeth some more...¬ ¬ Perhaps by the time it rains cupcakes and sprinkles some of my unwell family will also have died like my 2 friends who have died in my absence.

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Original Poster
Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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(25 minutes after post)
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And the orange tint around teeth and scrapping the white lines dont make them fade and gum receding where there may be a hole.

Fantastic that going to a dentist is impossible n theres little dickhead can do on a home visit except tell me to brush my teeth even though i don't have help i need.

Electric
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last online: 01/25, 20:20
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https://youtu.be/H_a46WJ1viA


When you're weary
Feeling small
When tears are in your eyes
I will dry them all

I'm on your side
When times get rough
And friends just can't be found
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down

When you're down and out
When you're on the street
When evening falls so hard
I will comfort you

I'll take your part
When darkness comes
And pain is all around
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down

Sail on Silver Girl,
Sail on by
Your time has come to shine
All your dreams are on their way
See how they shine
If you need a friend
I'm sailing right behind
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind

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Original Poster
Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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(18 hours after post)
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😢 thank u

Electric
BA1
last online: 01/25, 20:20
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(20 hours after post)
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You're welcome, girl.
One more and then a brighter day, right?
......I thought so.

https://youtu.be/pey29CLID3I

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verge
last online: 03/08, 18:09
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Where are you that this can happen? 😢 Are you at a facility? Are you at home alone?

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verge
last online: 03/08, 18:09
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Can you get a new home care assistant? I would brush your hair and your teeth and do your laundry. Nobody should be stuck like that.

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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Im in my own home. Care is complex. Circumstances are complex. My illness is complex.

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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The commode pot wouldnt have spilt on the carpet if mam hadnt caused to lose my temper by telling me i wasnt trying hard enough...

Then again though, the first time pot spilt was when i was sitting on commode n using my arms and legs to get into the next room when i was on my own.

Frustrating the extra work caused by me getting distressed by beinf told i wasnt trying.

When ive tried harder than anyone else. Ofcourse i would cos its me suffering

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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Atleast ive briefly been able to sort of wander into another room for a few minutes sometimes.

Better than when i couldnt and would feel like tearing the room apart and needing new pictures on the walls to change the scenery.

When i couldnt even have the curtains open.

Atleast i am able at times to come on here and express myself somewhat instead of being paralysed n locked up inside myself.

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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(1 day after post)
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Life ends up sleep eat n poop.

But coming on here means not enough energy for food drinks or pills.

Do i pick something i enjoy that makes life abit more worth living and get more sick....

Or do it purely survive each day with no enjoyment.

Whilst i wait for professionals to try and help me.

Jetmoo edited this post .

TRIGGER (since my friend said i shud use trigger warnings n whatever..)¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ The day when i can have my hair brushed, teeth brushed, clean knickers and wear clouthes will be a magical day.¬ ¬ Until then i have¬ unwashed hair since over a year ago, ¬ acne scars all of my face, neck, back, chest, arms, legs and a lovely spot on my privates,¬ aswell as spots and scabs,¬ Legs hairier than my dads,¬ Hairy pits,¬ Mountains of dead skin including in scalp,¬ Some mattered hair still remains,¬ Privates washed twice in one year,¬ No bedbath since 2018.¬ No bath since 2017.¬ No spending one day in sittingroom or wearing clothes since jan 2018,¬ No going outside since 2017,¬ And now my teeth are getting white lines where they meet the gums and i may be getting a hole,¬ Amongst my weight loss and sleep reversal and cognition being super ****¬ And period blood on my bedding, ¬ With feet unwashed that have stepped through urinated carpet and contaminated my bedding¬ And carpet cleaner to clean where commode spilt wee n blood. A small sponge scrub is not enough.¬ ¬ The day that dr dickhead and other dickheads decide to help me get more care hours will be the day the world rains rainbows sprinkles and cupcakes. I am in need of a good cupcake. Just to rot the teeth some more...¬ ¬ Perhaps by the time it rains cupcakes and sprinkles some of my unwell family will also have died like my 2 friends who have died in my absence.

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verge
last online: 03/08, 18:09
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Take care of your body because it really does make life easier and better to have as much functionality as possible. It's not worth it to destroy any health for simple pleasures when there is so much power in health. I am not in your situation, but I work with people every day who trashed their bodies and wished they hadn't. One thing that might help is being grateful for what you have now in terms of health and function, that's just something I do with me husband, take turns trying to think of something to be grateful for. It can be depressing sometimes when in a bad place, but it's always possible to think of something and it helps brighten life a little even when it looks bleak.

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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@verge i agree with u. Ive learnt this lesson the hard way already unfortunately.

The bright news is i have joined an M.E group and the advocate will be bk from hols on monday so shud b able to apply for help.

Some letters have been sent with data request forms (data received will be used as evidence of my needs to help get care hours)

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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@verge the hard part is, is that i spent so long purely surviving n nothing else. Literally. I've had no quality of life and now it is very limited but better than before.

When u have no quality of life for such a long period of time it makes u wonder if it is worth existing n not living. When existing is all work n no play.

I am fighting for my life back however n im not done yet.

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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I think its cos i have and continue to do my best with tryinf to get better and the missing piece is the extra care hours.

And i have worked extremely hard to get those hours and have been trying for a silly long time and have made little progree in all that time.

But starting to make some steps forward now.

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I used to have a hamster named trigger just fyi.

WHAT is going on with you? Are you pretty much bed ridden is that what I'm gathering? I can't believe you have any sort of caregiver if they're not cleaning you properly.

Are you older? Can you complain and get a new one? Or is this an unofficial caregiver? It sounds like you need help.

But also just fyi it doesn't take much energy to pull a trigger either. I'd threaten to shoot my caregiver if the *****bitch didn't do his/her job!

At least if it was being done this poorly.

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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Carers are doing their best to get me help. But its a struggle for them.

The other option is for them to tell social services (the ones who abused me n caused me to almost have a nervous breakdown) and say theyre struggling..

And for social services to find another provider who would likely abuse me.

I have a very poorly understood illness so have been misunderstood and abused many times. By medics, hospital staff, Drs, nurses...

But because my illness has been misrepresented by the NHS for years if abuse got reported then they would likely misunderstand aswell.

I would need a hot support letter from private dr which i have not got yet.

So we need to be careful how we go otherwise i could end up accused of self neglect and end up with a DOLS and end up in a psych ward being abused and forced to follow treatment which is harmful for us and risk dying like other people have.

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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My hair is now matt free n me n carers r making more steps forward

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Jetmoo
last online: 11/13, 0:06
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Hurray i have real hair now LOL

A
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