it just hit me
bit on the personal side, i've had some parting with some of my old friends and reconnecting with them is a very hard thing to do.
im a busy person now, it isn't what it was like in the old days.. when i was much more available and i would always be the one tending their "wounds of life" with my advice. later on i started having my own thing going on and frankly bit difficult dealings and was the one in need of support and tending - yet they still needed me for their problems.. thats where i kind of cut them off out of frustration just how could they freaking ignore me and talk about themselves.
During my absence of old friends, i've grown and became more mature with the reality and understanding of things. tho my strong will and righteousness of what i believe in has sort of .. weakened and i find myself fearful of their outrageous tantrums which leads me to keep away from them
in the long run, it still feels like someone died, at the same time I died when i keep myself from talking to them.
why? they're full of baggage man.. aint got time for that.
so to this day.. im cutting my losses.. moving on.. but what really bothers me is i cant get over that stupid feeling.
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