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210 replies, Replies 1 to 10

Too much snow.

I like the snow but. I havent winter clothes so when I go outside to feed the chickens I walk through snow up to my knees while I wear a dress, crocs, and no coat.

I also don't drive so that makes snow more enjoyable

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For once I did as I was told.

He said its a weird situation but typically with these kinda scams id give him the money so. Hes calling someone who he says has more experience so I feel less dumb at least and less on edge about the cops
So far all 3 I spoke with have been nice

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For once I did as I was told.

Update i called the cops after I got scared of his recent text. Lady seems nice but.. Definitely feeling thr full body shakes and I can't control it

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For once I did as I was told.

Rockster160 wrote:
Sounds like either a panic attack or malnourishment. Get some food, get some sugar, calm down however you've found best to do so. Then time to make some phone calls. ๐Ÿ™‚

Also. Im still fighting with myself about it but im more open to the idea of speaking to the police but its gonna take alot of bravery. Im afraid my theyll section me which would definitely blow my cover of keeping it a secret because I can't always hide who I am when im highly stressed.

But I am doing whatever I can to try to make it as stress-free as possible OMG RIGHT WHEN IM FEELING CALM HE CALLS. Jesus. Yeah see that him calling. Makes me loose my chill I worked hours to lessen my anxiety but. Hes not gona stop and I just want someone who knows what to do to help
Either to tell me ignore him or well take it from here. Idk. Hes not gonna stop. My fight or flight instincts just make me want to die.

I just can't handle it.
I know I seem dismissive of help sometimes but. Its because I have all this fear. I do want help but I dont want forced help. I'm like a horse. A horse is stronger than you. If it's bucking your not gonna win. If it's nervous or upset its best to let it chill and calm down and coax it. So yeah I sometimes shut an idea down verbally but I do think about it debating it for hours or days trying to decide

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For once I did as I was told.

Anonymous wrote:
Possibly money mule scam. Definitely very bad man.
https :// www . consumer . ftc . gov/features/pass-it-on/money-mule-scams

Please fill this online form. No need to leave the house. Police have little to gain from arresting victims.
https :// reportfraud . ftc . gov/#/assistant
(Job, money making -> investment should be adequate)

Hey I just wanted to let you know. I did end up doing that. It seemed non threatening which is ideal for someone who finds everything threatening โ™ก

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I received an antique knife as a gift.

I kinda wanna see the knife

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Does anyone want to talk about New Years resolutions?

Yeah I dont usually do new years resolutions. I do different stuff whenever I want.

But I guess my new years resolution would be to learn to "adult"
I'm trying to do more adult things
Not like drinking or boys but. Like maybe starting to save money and stuff.

My goals are usually in the now goals so current im only concerned about getting through the short term since that's hard enough.
Anytime I save up money I have to pay a large emergency vet bills or I give all my money away. I was saving money to get my cat an elective surgery that will improve her life when my big sister told me she was 2 months behind on rent, leaving her husband and had no own too watch the kids. I used all my money to pay her bills and I spent all this time at her place looking after her babies but my own babies suffered and that cat who I was saving money for got very very sick and almost died. Still isn't in the clear. I didnt know she was sick either because I was gone a full week watching my sisters kids.

I constantly do that. My sister ended up in a bad way cause shes irresponsible and everyone always knows I'll help anyway but that doesn't always help myself. So my short term goals is to get my cat well, get her the 2 surgeries, and get better and self care. Sometimes I just dont do basic self care. Not sometimes. Most the time.
I won't take care of my hair so I cut it.

Things like that.

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For once I did as I was told.

IM LOSING IT. HE SENT MORE MONEY also he texted me

I just want to kill myself ๐Ÿ™ƒ

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For once I did as I was told.

Nah I'm just gonna probably do it my way. Which is the wrong way

To me it just seems better to disappear

SO. I'll work on that and if I go to jail I guess you'll here from when I get out and im tryna readjust to society ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿผโ€โ™€๏ธ yeah I make jokes but im aware its not funny I just dont want more tension.

Pretty sure it anxiety or something. When I puked all over.my room it was anxiety. Hanging out with animals too much. Upset puking like a cat or dog

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For once I did as I was told.

Not sure whyyyy but it happens if im gonna lose it ๐Ÿ˜ถ and it's very tiring
Its like a excercise and my organs and muscles get tired

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