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Jebus-Zeus
last online: 10/09, 19:48
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I understand the importance the resurrection story holds in your particular religion.

If I too knew some guy that had been killed and placed inside a cave with a rock in front of it and I visited the cave to find the rock moved and his body gone, the only logical assumption would be that he had risen from the dead and is the son of God. Once, my friend Simon was rushed to hospital to have his appendix removed and I visited him the next day to find his bed empty. I immediately sacrificed a goat and burnt a witch in his name but it turned out that he had not had appendicitis, just needed a good poo, and was at home playing Playstation.
Someone probably should have asked "So the rock has been moved and he's gone... has anyone checked his house?" I realise Playstation was not around in those days but they probably had the equivalent. A muddy stick or something. I would have said "Can someone please check if Jesus is at home playing with his muddy stick, if not, then and only then should we all assume, logically, that he has risen from the dead and is the son of God."
If we accept though, that Jesus was the son of an Infinite Being capable of anything, he probably did have a Playstation. Probably a Playstation 7. I know I have to get my offspring all the latest gadgets. God would probably have said to him, "I was going to wait another two thousand years to give you this but seeing as you have been good... just don't tell your mother about Grand Theft Auto."
Also, is it true that Jesus can be stabbed during a sword fight and be ok due to the fact that he can only die if he gets his head chopped off?

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Since writing this post Jebus-Zeus may have helped people, but has not within the last four (4) days.
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god, son, jesus, rock, playstation
Replies (36)
Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(11 hours after post)
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Josephus, the Jewish historian, records that Christ was crucified. We have the attestations of the Apostles that he was resurrected from the dead. If it was all a made-up story, you wouldn't have had a woman being the first one to report seeing the risen Lord. Nor would you have had the Apostles going to their tortuous deaths to spread a lie, or the chief persecutor of the Christians being converted on the road to Damascus. Immediately following the Crucifixion, the Apostles were in total disarray, demoralized and scared. Something would have had to happen to give them the faith and fortitude to carry on. The world was changed by the Resurrection of Christ. The world would be changed further if more people believed and took to heart the teachings of Christ.

Happy earth
(13 hours after post)
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Why does it matter to you?

I don't believe Jesus was God, but I see no need to mock the beliefs of others. What is gained from it?

Still doin stuff for starbyface
(14 hours after post)
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Eh, when I was 13-14 or so, I used to be super facetious (and yet totally serious) regarding my Anti-Twilight phase. The series was super popular, I didn't like how the zealous fans acted. Naturally I posted stuff about Team Tyler's Van and became very fixated on weird things like the "I made Charlie pancakes" / "he scoffed into his cereal bowl" bit. Once got an "A" from a paper on how Christopher Moore's vampires are more true to the originals than Meyer's.

And you know what. I was a weirdo, but I made some good points. And Jesus Christ absolutely has a Playstation 7. Also, I need to borrow his AV cables.

And I am absolutely relieved to know from this post, that when I get pains in my abdomen, I probably just need a good poo.

Jebus-Zeus wrote:
Also, is it true that Jesus can be stabbed during a sword fight and be ok due to the fact that he can only die if he gets his head chopped off?

Where are you getting this information? Getting his head chopped off didn't even kill Jefferson in OUAT. If he can get his head fused back on, so can our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

12
(16 hours after post)
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hey im not besmirching The Jesus... its all Good, he's coolio

Favidbowiepic
last online: 03/16, 22:34
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(16 hours after post)
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I still maintain the idea that Jesus just gave up his weekend for Christian sinners...

Still doin stuff for starbyface
(16 hours after post)
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And I appreciate it, but really, about that AV cable...

12
(17 hours after post)
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CarolineFCY wrote:
And I appreciate it, but really, about that AV cable...

your gonna have to pray

Images
(17 hours after post)
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Sherlock wrote:
Josephus, the Jewish historian, records that Christ was crucified. We have the attestations of the Apostles that he was resurrected from the dead. If it was all a made-up story, you wouldn't have had a woman being the first one to report seeing the risen Lord. Nor would you have had the Apostles going to their tortuous deaths to spread a lie, or the chief persecutor of the Christians being converted on the road to Damascus. Immediately following the Crucifixion, the Apostles were in total disarray, demoralized and scared. Something would have had to happen to give them the faith and fortitude to carry on. The world was changed by the Resurrection of Christ. The world would be changed further if more people believed and took to heart the teachings of Christ.

Josephus wrote in the year 96 ce. Almost a hundred years after the fact. He was not even born in the time of Jesus. He did not witness the event. It is largely believed that those passages were altered by believers.
Why would it matter if it were a woman or a man? The author could have made up either.
The stories about the apostles dying martyr's deaths are made up. Many islamic martyrs also die for their faith. Should we believe them too for that reason? These followers are in other words fanatics.

Images
(18 hours after post)
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@Sherlock if you read Bart Erhman, you wil realize that the names of the books of the gospels were given long after they were written. The authors weren't really apostles.

12
(20 hours after post)
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hey, this post was just for comedic value, if you wanna argue religion, do it in your shouts or make another post. ps, im sure the jesus had a sense of humor.

Still doin stuff for starbyface
(20 hours after post)
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Jebus-Zeus wrote:

CarolineFCY wrote:
And I appreciate it, but really, about that AV cable...

your gonna have to pray

Damn it, I'm 13th in the queue.

Jebus-Zeus wrote:
hey, this post was just for comedic value, if you wanna argue religion, do it in your shouts or make another post. ps, im sure the jesus had a sense of humor.

Sure did. Water to wine, guy was great at parties when you got Him away from the PlayStation and muddy stick.

12
(21 hours after post)
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CarolineFCY wrote:

Jebus-Zeus wrote:

CarolineFCY wrote:
And I appreciate it, but really, about that AV cable...

your gonna have to pray

Damn it, I'm 13th in the queue.

Jebus-Zeus wrote:
hey, this post was just for comedic value, if you wanna argue religion, do it in your shouts or make another post. ps, im sure the jesus had a sense of humor.

Sure did. Water to wine, guy was great at parties when you got Him away from the PlayStation and muddy stick.

if you say the jesus backwards its sounds like sausage..

Happy earth
(1 day after post)
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Jebus-Zeus wrote:
hey, this post was just for comedic value

Apologies for my lack of humor and holier-than-thou attitude. Sometimes I take life much too seriously.

12
(1 day after post)
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smiley wrote:

Jebus-Zeus wrote:
hey, this post was just for comedic value

Apologies for my lack of humor and holier-than-thou attitude. Sometimes I take life much too seriously.

da nada

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(2 days after post)
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SerenelyBlue wrote:

Sherlock wrote:
Josephus, the Jewish historian, records that Christ was crucified. We have the attestations of the Apostles that he was resurrected from the dead. If it was all a made-up story, you wouldn't have had a woman being the first one to report seeing the risen Lord. Nor would you have had the Apostles going to their tortuous deaths to spread a lie, or the chief persecutor of the Christians being converted on the road to Damascus. Immediately following the Crucifixion, the Apostles were in total disarray, demoralized and scared. Something would have had to happen to give them the faith and fortitude to carry on. The world was changed by the Resurrection of Christ. The world would be changed further if more people believed and took to heart the teachings of Christ.

Josephus wrote in the year 96 ce. Almost a hundred years after the fact. He was not even born in the time of Jesus. He did not witness the event. It is largely believed that those passages were altered by believers.
Why would it matter if it were a woman or a man? The author could have made up either.
The stories about the apostles dying martyr's deaths are made up. Many islamic martyrs also die for their faith. Should we believe them too for that reason? These followers are in other words fanatics.

You are wrong about Josephus' writings. He wrote "The Jewish War" in 75 A.D. As a historian, he was familiar with events just before his lifetime. He mentions both Jesus and John the Baptist. We also know that Pontius Pilate was a real person--a tablet bearing his name, and dated to the time period of Jesus, was found in Israel. Josephus also mentions Pilate, who is also mentioned by Tacitus and Philo of Alexandria.

After the Crucifixion and Resurrection of Christ, strange things happened in the temple. When the lots for the goats were chosen by the high priest on the Day of Atonement, the priest always picked the black lot first--considered a bad omen. Black lots were picked from the Crucifixion until the destruction of the temple in 70 A.D. The odds of that happening year after year from 33 A.D. to 70 A.D. are about one in 5 billion. Also, when the red sash was cut in two and one part retained by the high priest, and the other part placed on the scapegoat, the red cloth NEVER turned white as it did in years past. The heavy bronze doors to the temple would also open by themselves every night--it took 20 men to move them, but they opened by themselves. The light on the menorah closest to the Holiest of Holies would always go out--it would not stay lit. Finally, just before the temple's destruction, Josephus records that a strange white light permeated the entire temple at night for a few hours, and then went out. This was perceived as the spirit of God leaving the temple. Now--these facts are recorded in the Jerusalem Talmud, which, Serenity, is a JEWISH source. The Sanhedrin blamed all of these happenings on Jesus. What is NOT in dispute is that they HAPPENED.

Some of Paul's letters are dated from around 55 - 60 A.D. The Gospels themselves were written from around 60 - 70 A.D. The synoptic Gospels were written by people who KNEW the original Apostles; the Gospel of John was supposedly written by the Apostle John himself--John the son of Zebedee.

Islam, if you recall, was spread by the armies of Islam after the death of Muhammad. Christians and Jews living in conquered lands were required to pay a heavy tax, the jizyah, to their new overlords or face execution. The Muslim Crusades predate the Christian Crusades by centuries. Both were bloody affairs. Right after the death of Muhammad, his son-in-law and cousin, Ali, was killed in internecine warfare.

Finally, the Apostles were NOT fanatics. They were scared s*****ss after the Crucifixion. There is quite a difference between people like that and fanatics. Fanatics have limited capacity for reason. The Apostles preached with both reason and the words of Jesus on their side.

Christianity is not a myth. It is real. And the truth is there for those who will but seek it.

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(2 days after post)
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I have also taught courses on religion and have used some of Ehrman's works. He cannot connect the dots because his atheist frame of reference does not allow him to. For example, Ehrman claims that victims of crucifixion were not buried. Wrong--and we have archaeological proof. I could go on, but it would take weeks and the writing of many books!

Images
(2 days after post)
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Ok, you win. Jesus was resurrected. In your mind. If you believe what you say, good for you. Hold on to it.

12
(2 days after post)
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SerenelyBlue wrote:
Ok, you win. Jesus was resurrected. In your mind. If you believe what you say, good for you. Hold on to it.

lulz

12
(2 days after post)
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Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(2 days after post)
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Interesting how a Buddhist monk would have supported his widowed mother thousands of miles away!

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(2 days after post)
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SerenelyBlue wrote:
Ok, you win. Jesus was resurrected. In your mind. If you believe what you say, good for you. Hold on to it.

Ah. But, as you know, the state of my mind does not change anything. I can believe that there are no bears in the woods; my belief has nothing to do with the actual population of bears. If I walk into the woods without bear spray or a gun, I could be killed and eaten.

I have made a lifetime out of studying Christ and the Bible. There is, beyond any shadow of a doubt, the fact that Jesus lived and walked the earth and had many followers, and that after his death he reappeared to his followers and gave them further guidance. Actually, it had not dawned upon the Apostles that Jesus had been telling them of his death and resurrection until after they saw him resurrected!

But when you have God, who created the entire Cosmos, all the dimensions, time itself, and us, it would be child's play for him to bring the mortal body of his Son back to life.

Believing that we are all the product of an endless series of lucky cosmic and biological accidents is like believing that a tornado could blow through a junkyard and assemble an airworthy Boeing 767 as it did so.

Which sounds like the more difficult thing to believe?

Images
(3 days after post)
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The evolution of the universe took billions of years. The evolution of intelligent life took millions. It is a slow process with much refinement. It is not a happy accident as you seem to believe.
There are so many contradictions and inconsistencies in your "holy" bible. The gospels are more fiction that anything else. Nothing is certain about Jesus. You need blind faith to believe in god and jesus because there is no other valid evidence. None whatsoever. You make up stories about doors opening and light witnessed and this and that but you don't have a case.
Show me your god. Show me how to see evidence of him. You have no evidence. You belong to a cult. Like the mormons and the scientologists and all the cults out there. You use the bible to prove that the bible is real. Show me proof of god.

Images
(3 days after post)
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And don't tell me you don't believe in evolution. If you don't, save your breath, because I don't want to hear more ignorance.

12
(3 days after post)
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i believe in miracles, you sexy thing

12
(3 days after post)
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Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(4 days after post)
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Of course I believe in evolution--but I also believe that evolution got "tweaked" a number of times. Zillions of times. Consider wings. Before being fully developed, wings could be a hindrance. How about color rods in our eyes? How does the creature's body KNOW that there is some advantage that could be added? What is the mechanism for designing complex bodily structures and getting them encoded into the DNA? How would color rods evolve on their own?

Like I said before, the truth is out there. Read the Jerusalem Talmud for starters. HOW do you explain those strange happenings in the Temple--which are recorded by people who did not even like Jesus? Ask yourself WHY the gods of the Assyrians, ancient Egyptians, Greeks and Romans, and Canaanites are in the dustbin of history now--while there are 1.2 BILLION Christians and some 20 million Jews?

You assume that God lives right in your own neighborhood, and that if you can't find His house on YOUR block, he does not exist. You assume He also exists in your own dimension and slice of the multiverse and in your own time continuum. That's like saying if you don't find a grizzly bear living on your block that they don't exist.

God exists outside of time and space and all the dimensions. He will not magically appear in front of you to do handstands or pull bunnies out of hats.

In 2000 years, it will be difficult to find proof of your existence and proof of my existence. There will be wars and natural disasters. Then, when some record is found, people could pooh-pooh it just like you are doing now. You should read this article about proof of people mentioned in the Bible--particularly about Jesus: https://www.biblicalarchaeology.org/daily/peopl...

You will not find Jesus as the result of some scientific experiment. You will be able to communicate with God when YOU go to the place where God wants you to be.

EVERYONE is traveling on the road to Damascus. We can be receptive to an encounter with the Almighty, or we can shrug it off. The Apostle Paul became a believer as a result of HIS encounter.

And, have you ever considered this---in all other religions, humankind is reaching out to God. Christianity and Judaism are accounts of God reaching out to humankind. THIS is the single, greatest and most fundamental difference in all the world's religions.

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(4 days after post)
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Lastly, those who do not have God still have a god. Ponder that for a while.

Images
(4 days after post)
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Ok, so you don't understand how different things evolved all on their own. So you say God did it. He tweaked evolution in a zillion instances. Throughout history those "God did it" instances became less and less as scientists discover how things work. God used to make the sun rise and fall. God used to bring forth the colours of the rainbow as a sign of no more floods. Now God tweeks evolution and hurries off into another dimension because he he is shy of human eyes. He lives in a whole other part of a multiverse perhaps. Wow. Indeed wow... where did you read these things in the Bible? I read, God created Adam from dirt. You read he tweaked evolution and stays in another dimension or part of the multiverse. I can't find that in a book that reads as if it has been written by people who lived in the ancient times that it was written in.

Ask yourself, why are there so many Muslims. Their god must be real too then right? If the number of Christians at this very moment is your reason why Christianity must be real then explain why Islam is growing and outgrowing Christianity in many areas on the globe.
I believe that if there is a god, which is possible, it would be a deist god. A god that put everything in motion and let it develop on its own. He could well be anywhere. You believe in an anthropomorphic god of the bible. This god gets pissed, he is filled with humanlike love. This god gets angry at his offspring and drowns them in global flood (no evidence for it). This god gets jealous.
Do you really think the mighty creator of the existence is troubled by human emotions. A god that has the power to create the big bang (perhaps multiple big bangs in the multiverse) is bogged down to this blue marble in seemingly never ending space.
Humans evolved as a direct result of their environment through natural selection. Nature played the role in ********breeding only those which ultimately had the promise of overcoming hurdles. How can such a creature be in the image of God? How can such a creature be the pinnacle of creation. Yes evolution is marvelous and it is a wonder that we are what we are.
What makes you think a possible god is your god? You seem to think that if there is a god, he must be the Christian god. What is your proof?
Why didn't Jesus, like for example, Confucius write his own bible. Imagine what a wonderful document the father of existence could write. If I were a Christian I would be ashamed to call the Bible the word of god.
If god could tweak evolution a zillion times, if he could raise Jesus to life, why did he not preserve the truth better?
Those who do not have a God have a god. You mean like Satan? That mythical story, like seth of Egypt. I love mythology. The human mind is brilliant when it comes to imagining such things.
Or do you mean I have a god, like I love knowledge or something like that. I do not understand.
I think you are obsessed with gods.
The universe could have come about in a way where no god is involved.

Images
(4 days after post)
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Thank you for the article. I don't really have a problem with the existence of Jesus, if he existed.
If you've read Bart Erhman, as you say you have, you will see that he believes Jesus was a human apocalyptic teacher. What he is and has done was embellished by humans.
I don't know if you've seen Brave Heart. After William Wallace disappeared his stature grew dramatically . All of a sudden he was taller and he has killed 100 men. You get the picture.

12
(4 days after post)
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SerenelyBlue wrote:
Thank you for the article. I don't really have a problem with the existence of Jesus, if he existed.
If you've read Bart Erhman, as you say you have, you will see that he believes Jesus was a human apocalyptic teacher. What he is and has done was embellished by humans.
I don't know if you've seen Brave Heart. After William Wallace disappeared his stature grew dramatically . All of a sudden he was taller and he has killed 100 men. You get the picture.

william wallace was a badass.. oh wait, that was mel gibson

Images
(4 days after post)
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๐Ÿ˜€yup

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(5 days after post)
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Christ rode a donkey into Jerusalem. A conqueror would have ridden a horse. If the story were embellished, a woman would not have been the first to see the risen Jesus. And the Apostles would not have been ordinary men, but the intelligentsia of their day. And a fiery chariot would have taken Him into heaven before He could have been crucified. You get the picture.

Images
(5 days after post)
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Sherlock wrote:
Christ rode a donkey into Jerusalem. A conqueror would have ridden a horse. If the story were embellished, a woman would not have been the first to see the risen Jesus. And the Apostles would not have been ordinary men, but the intelligentsia of their day. And a fiery chariot would have taken Him into heaven before He could have been crucified. You get the picture.

Actually I get a clear picture out of how his followers justified the crucifiction of their teacher. If he existed.
And, why would you care to limit their imagination to your idea of how you think they should have told the story?
The embellished story is in keeping with the theme and teaching of Jesus.
If Jesus really raised people from the dead, healed people, walked on water and more, how could these miracles not have been noticed by the real historians of his time?

Images
(5 days after post)
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Gautama Buddha's followers also wanted to make him a god. Followers tend to want to make their spiritual teachers into gods, especially if they claim they are, as in Jesus's case.

12
(5 days after post)
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SerenelyBlue wrote:
Gautama Buddha's followers also wanted to make him a god. Followers tend to want to make their spiritual teachers into gods, especially if they claim they are, as in Jesus's case.

jeeze you two, get a room

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
(6 days after post)
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SerenelyBlue wrote:
Gautama Buddha's followers also wanted to make him a god. Followers tend to want to make their spiritual teachers into gods, especially if they claim they are, as in Jesus's case.

True in a number of cases. However, Jesus is the only "spiritual teacher" who came back from the dead, in physical form, and stayed with his followers 40 days.

Make no mistake, it was an ignominious death. Crucifixion was like a Roman "public service announcement." By the standards of the world, Jesus had lost. He was finished. That would be the end of the movement started by Jesus.

Only it wasn't, for one simple reason: Jesus came back from the dead. Eyewitness accounts are recorded in the Gospels, and Paul had his own encounter--sorry there were no video cameras back then.

From the Crucifixion and Resurrection until the destruction of the Temple in A.D. 70, strange things happened in the Temple, as recorded by the non-Christian Jews. The record of these events is undisputed. These non-Christian Jews had no reason to advance the cause of Christianity. No one has ever successfully challenged the authenticity of the Jerusalem Talmud.

Now, Serenity, if you are right, then the universe will continue to expand, all of the stars will eventually burn out, the last proton will decay into nothingness, and there won't be any trace of our existence. Our lives will have been entirely meaningless.

If I am right, what happens to the physical universe or multiverse will not affect those who have chosen to accept and serve God.

I choose to belief that my life has meaning, that this life is not everything there is, and that there is a Supreme Power who cares about us.

One is a cheerless philosophy. The other offers love and hope for all humanity.

These are the reasons I abandoned my own "atheistic stage" long ago.


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