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If you want to befriend someone of the opposite gender and don't want to seem "interested", how?

I'm socially awkward. I seriously really don't know how. I don't want to lead anyone on.

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Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last four (4) days.
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interested, gender, awkward, socially, lead
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Nevermind
last online: 02/20, 6:06
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(8 minutes after post)
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Act the same as you would with someone of the same ***sex.

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soco
last online: 03/19, 3:49
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Truthfully, you have absolute zero control of how someone will interpret the words you choose to relay.

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We have another hurricane coming this way.

Roccoflip
Rockster160
last online: <time class="timeago" datetime="1730969927" title="Nov 7, 2024 8:58">Nov 7, 2024 8:58</time>
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Ask them to hang out in groups with other people (at least to start) and do group/hang out stuff- not date stuff.

Play games instead of watching movies, do sporty activities rather than going to a restaurant, etc.

Roccoflip
Rockster160
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And like @soco said- there comes a point where this is outside of your control and people will think and feel however they may. But you need to be straightforward and honest with them. If it ever starts to seem like more, itโ€™s best to nip it at the bud and clear the air. Be honest and let them know what you are interested in.

Billy mills
Lawn
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Refer to them as "buddy" or "sis". Tell them about other people you find attractive.

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How difficult is it to build a back-end rest API with Amazon Web Services?

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Anonymous
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Very good suggestions. Thanks.

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
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Ha--risky business! ;-)

Dr. ralph club zps9ornptsl
DocteurRalph
last online: <time class="timeago" datetime="1729727397" title="Oct 23, 2024 23:49">Oct 23, 2024 23:49</time>
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I'm guessing you're a girl, I can't remember a guy ever saying "I want to be friends with this girl that I'm not interested in sexually". So yeah any guy you befriend will more than likely try to make the relationship more than you want it to be, that's what guys generally do. Of course I'm a dinosaur and men are changing a lot, maybe there are actually guys out there who can just be friends with a girl these days. It's possible, heck people don't even know what gender they are anymore.

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I need help.

Original Poster
Anonymous
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(1 day after post)
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Yes, I'm a girl.

I notice guys are saying it's not possible. What about online friendship? If a girl/woman sends a guy a message, does he automatically think she "wants" him?

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Anonymous
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Why would gender matter on the internet?

Roccoflip
Rockster160
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Gender only matters because it actually plays a significant role in our behavior.

And I think most of the advice given was actually not gender based?

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
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Anonymous wrote:
Yes, I'm a girl.

I notice guys are saying it's not possible. What about online friendship? If a girl/woman sends a guy a message, does he automatically think she "wants" him?

Most likely, yes. At least he considers that to be a possibility.

People are constantly seeking validation. And affection. And love.

Dr. ralph club zps9ornptsl
DocteurRalph
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I'm sure you can have an online friendship with a guy without any sexual advances. If you're just kind of cold and matter of fact and not too overly friendly it shouldn't be a problem at all.

But really what is the motivation for the friendship? Are you seeking to gain knowledge or something? I think if you are just looking for companionship without any entanglements it would be easier if there wasn't the whole male/female thing involved.

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I need help.

Original Poster
Anonymous
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It's just that I seem to usually relate better to males than to females, that's all. If I see somebody interesting online, I might say hello. I don't want it to be taken as a come-on. I don't want to lead anyone on or deal with the awkwardness of an infatuation. I love my friends, heck I even love some acquaintances and strangers that I find interesting, but not in a sexual or romantic way.

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
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Truth be told, about 60% of the guys wait for the female to make the first overture. Why? Because they don't want to be "cold calling" and get rejected. When I was in high school, some of the prettiest girls went dateless because guys figured that if they called, they'd be rejected.

One foreseeable problem: if you make a friendly overture, and the guy thinks you're interested, and then you tell him you are not--then you could be labeled as a "tease" and the guys will then avoid you like the plague.

I'd suggest developing some girl friends. Guys also see it as a red flag if a women doesn't have any girlfriends. They think there's a reason if a woman has no gal pals.

A
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