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338 replies, Replies 251 to 260

Domestic violence and abuse..

Anonymous wrote:
If he ain't actin' like Jesus, then he ain't the one.

:) i dont act like Jesus either; but thank you!

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I've been scared of someone for years and because of the illness I had feel bad for even considering contacting them.

After reading your other post which you wrote this one relates to, i wouldn't recommend you sending anything to him. If you are able to, do get that counselling help for yourself. All the best! Hope you can become free from this burden and enjoy a healthy life and love xx

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Domestic violence and abuse..

Silverset wrote:
What u mean by you never do?

I think by the sounds of it so much has built up and u reached breaking point ***xxx
look after urself :)

Yes, you are absolutely right - so much had happened and i did reach a breaking point.

However, as Sherlock writes, i am fully aware that hiting him was wrong (and after he 'politely asked me to leave' or he would call the police, i also hit a mirror on his car as i eventually left).

I agree there is no excuse for hitting someone or their property. It was wrong of me.

And to answer why i NEVER listen which will answer also Sherlock - yes, in the past i went ONLY for underdogs! For various reasons as i tried to figure these out for the past 10 years. That is when i began to live a celibate life on a recommendation of a therapist - she said two years celibacy before a therapy can start.

However, after two years i had no money for a therapy and i thought i was all 'cured', i began dating and after just one date with maybe a fifth guy from a dating site, i was extremely lucky to survive and in good health! :(

I realised i am not capable of dating safely and i was a danger to myself, so stopped dating altogether. As i became a Christian at that time, i offered my celibate life to God and asked him to heal me of my selfdestruction and i would serve him by fostering children...

So now when i am at a position to finally foster as my daughter is going to uni, i realised that if i was pregnant with this guy (which is almost impossible as i had a sterilization), i would not keep the child even if it miraculously survived - i'd get it adopted! :(( Two men left me when i got pregnant. I aborted the second baby - the guy told me for almost 10 months every day how much he loved me and how he wanted to marry me, and then wben i told him i was pregnant, he didnot say a word; he went out to have a cigarret, and when he got in the house, he picked up a few things which he had in my place, and he left - without saying one word! :(

I have spent the past 10 years reading about pathologicals, having counselling and recovering as i have been suffering with all sorts of mental issues since then. I 'became a Christian' because when the last psychopath destroyed all he could and wouldnt leave me alone and i had no support, and couldnt even get a restraining order, i began contemplating to kill him. I wasnt copying at all and i didnt see any other way. However, up to that oint i was against violence or killing my whole life; and i remember sitting there thinking how wrong i had been and that some people do need to be killed as they are so dangerous.. It was at that time when i 'heard' (what i believe was) God, to tell me that i didnt want to do that, that i wanted to go to church instead. And i went! I always hated religion and nobody could believe that i would go as i was behaving like a total rebel..

Anyway, so here i am, after 10 year celibacy, never wanting to date again, happy with attempting to follow Christ, and looking forward to finally foster kids; i allowed this guy to talk me into going on a date with him ,which he said was not even a date, and i told him only one date, and then i won't see him again.. (and shall i even mention having ***sex which i didnt want at all to happen!) Yep, what a fool! All destroyed.. i just want to run away and live somewhere in a jungle :((((

And praying that God will give me that self control not to smash the guy's car and his face..as at this point all is hopeless, all is broken; i dont know how to go on anymore!

I say thank you again, guys, you are keeping my sanity, im struggling to carry on going big time..

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Domestic violence and abuse..

Silverset wrote:
she has many posts. his behaviour has nothing to do with you

Thank you, Silverset. Her description was 99% accurate of him. However, as she says at the end - the question is: if you will listen (that he is saying he is narcisstic) before it's too late. I NEVER do! :(

Anyway, within that month there were some positive changes in him from which i would presume that he is not pathological. But done so much hurt and damage.. - i let him :/

Thank you. xx

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Domestic violence and abuse..

Silverset wrote:
is ur partner a narcissist?

He behaved like one, yes. (But not a partner, just a guy i dated for a very long month.)

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Domestic violence and abuse..

Thank you, soco <3

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God I'm SO SICK of waking up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:( sorry you are feeling like it.

Have you got some health issues? Money issues? Toxic parents? Abusive partner? A bully boss? Are you homeless..?

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Domestic violence and abuse..

Thank you all for your messages! I did really badly at work today, deserve to be fired; your support got me through today. Thank you! xx

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Domestic violence and abuse..

soco wrote:
Get a restraining order put on him. Abusers like to also play the victim. They think that it might convince you to lower your guard just a little. Don't play his games. You can do better than this guy. Hell, I can find you a true gentleman in one day for you.

Thank you, soco, you are right, now i see it - his sick mind games and how i fell for it :( And for his lies..

There will not be a need for a restraining order; he will leave me alone now - he has succeeded to break me; im emotionally and mentally a wreck; would quit my job and went walkabout if i didnt have a daughter. Im going out of my mind.. :/

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Domestic violence and abuse..

music=life wrote:
I recently went through a similar thing. I just started trying to get back out on the dating scene and realized I am not ready. I think you have 2 options. 1 take more time and focus on you, make new friends and create a good support system (this is what Iโ€™m try to do now). 2 get back out there but go at your pace. You set the rules and make it clear that he knows that. And donโ€™t take ****shit from no one. If you are being deceived or hurt SHUT IT DOWN. you have all the power!

Thank you, music=life. Im sorry you have been through the same ordeal :( Hope you feel better now.

And yes, #1 for me as i can not do #2 :(

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