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Name for a new puppy.

How about Irving?

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How do I build my self esteem?

The first line of defense against depression and anxiety is B vitamins. Get B-50 or B-100 pills. Vitamin B2 is a water soluble dye that turns urine bright yellow. When the color fades, it's time for another dose. Read some books about nutrition so you know how to eat right. Nutrition won't make you feel good, it makes you feel normal.

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Stand

I'm whelmed!

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Doritos just came out with a new Vomit flavored chip.

The reason why pre-grated parmesan tastes of vomit is that parmesan cheese contains two short-chain fatty-acids called butyric and isovaleric acid, which are the very same 'sweaty feet' chemicals contained in our vomit and body odour smell. Grating the parmesan intensifies this effect.
Cheese - QI : Quite Interesting
qi.com/infocloud/cheese

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What happens after a death (practical not spiritual).

REINCARNATION
(author unknown)

"What does reincarnation mean?" a fellow asked his friend.
His pal replied, "It happens when your life has reached its end.
They comb your hair, and wash your neck, and clean your fingernails,
And lay you in a padded box away from life's travails.

The box and you goes in a hole that's been dug into the ground.
Reincarnation starts in when you're planted in the ground.
Them clods melt down just like your box, and you who is inside.
And then you're just beginning on your transformation ride.

In a while the grass will grow upon your rendered mound,
Till some day on your flattened grave a lonely flower is found.
And say a horse should wander by and graze upon this flower
That once was you, but now's become your vegetative bower.

This posey that the horse done ate up, with his other feed,
Makes bone, and fat, and muscle essential to the steed.
But some is left that he can't use, and so it passes through,
And finally lays upon the ground - this thing that once was you.

Then say, by chance, I wander by and see this thing upon the ground,
And I ponder, and I wonder at this object that I've found.
I think of reincarnation - of life and death and such,
And come away concluding, "Friend, you ain't changed all that much."

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Using a financial calculator.

When you buy a calculator it comes with a book that tells you, button by button, how to work it.

Get a ruler in your hands. Measure things until you start to understand how a ruler works. Measure some stuff and figure out where the center is. Say you measure a book and it's 7/8" thick. You look at your ruler and see that every eighth is divided into two sixteenths, so obviously half of 7/8" is going to be 7/16". If you write that out you have 1/2 x 7/8 = 7/16. And you notice that 1/2 is divided into 2/4 and then into 4/8 and so on, so you can convert anything to anything by multiplying all the numbers on top and then all the numbers on bottom.

Other rulers are divided into 10 and 100 parts. But an inch is still an inch, so anything on one ruler can be translated to the other ruler. A half inch on one ruler is 5/10 or 50/100 on the other. An eighth inch is just 12.5 marks when you have 100 marks per inch. A metric ruler divides an inch into 25.4 parts, so a half inch would be 12.7 of those parts. Pretty simple, isn't it? Practice this a bit and people will think you went to wizard school.

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Can a bank take your newer car days after purchasing it?

Never buy a car with payments. If anything goes wrong, you are also without wheels. It's better to walk or ride a bus until you can pay all cash and own your wheels free and clear.

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How to stop stress?

Drug stores carry a vitamin called B-100. One a day and you can handle almost any level of stress. Vitamin B2 is a water soluble dye that makes urine bright yellow. When the color fades, it's time for another pill.

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Closed.

Uh, ... chocolate?

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