Agreed with Padre. Vomiting blood is usually a sure sign that something is wrong with your body and it needs to get checked out right away.
That said, your weight or your size has nothing to do with the value of your existence. That’s measured by the hearts you touch. Just by existing, you can affect so many around in a positive way. You can help others. You can conquer this disorder, and then help others avoid going down the same path. Write about your experiences and troubles, what made it hard. Write about the things that made it better and then focus on those things. Every person can do so much, we just have to take care of ourselves so that we can do it.
- written[quote J.N-Bucking]
Rockster160 wrote:
J.N-Bucking wrote:
Rockster160 wrote:
[quote from J.N-Bucking]So the person born with both organs gets to choose (or most likely their parents do when they're a baby) and there's no telling that the selected ***sex would be the one the person identifies with, and if thats the case youve now got someone living in the wrong body.
So do they need to suffer or can they swap over?
Or if people have to stick with what they're born with should the hermafradite need to be male AND female forever, never feeling normal.
Since people are supposed to be either male OR female, and what you're born with is what you are, then hermafradites couldn't exist.
If we accept that they do indeed exist, and it was some sort of genetic mutation of the foetus that caused a person to have both organs, don't we then have no choice to accept that some sort of genetic issue (or any other issue in conception or gestation could not only cause a person to be born with BOTH, but be born with the WRONG ones?
The choice in this matter is because they ARE both. To avoid confusion/embarrassment. They are what they are, there is no denying that.
It IS a genetic mutation. Again, unalterable fact.The term "wrong ones" used in this reference is used incorrectly, because it's used to cover an opinion. Gender is not opinion. It's a state. You can't change the color of your eyes or the color of your hair. You can dye your hair and put in different colored contacts, but that simply hides what they really are. Just like you can dress as the opposite gender. It doesn't actually change anything, it just hides the truth. I could say my eyes are the "wrong color". I can claim my eyes are golden or red all I want. I can get contacts that make them LOOK that color. But my eyes are, and forever will be, blue. Does that mean my eyes are the wrong color? No. It's not the color I want, sure. But they aren't "wrong". It's a state of reality, not a question of opinion.
(I love my eyes- just using eye color as example.)
Yes they ARE both, but they're going to have surgery to BECOME just one.
So now they are let's say male, would you be reluctant to call them he / him?
That's not what they were born as after all.
Wouldn't it be CORRECT to always see that person as a heshe / sheman?
Would it be fair to refer to them as such since that's what they were born as, and gender is a state after all, so they can never be male OR female.I wouldn't class a man dressed as a woman as a woman, but once they've lived that way a few years and undergone all the psychiatric evaluations needed before treatment and surgery, and once they have undergone full reasignment surgery, LEGALLY changed their gender, ill happily see them as, and call them a woman.
As I stated in my first response, once they’ve undergone the surgery to change it, then they’re officially the other gender.
The problem is all of the people that just “say” they are the other gender. Or genderless. Or whatever crazy prefix they’re using. They dress up, either grow their hair out or cut it short, and start acting like the other. That counts about as much as standing in a garage and calling yourself a car.
If I altered the pigments in my eyes to be a different color, then my eyes are that color. If I put colored contacts in, my eyes are still blue.
As far as being reluctant to call somebody he/her- if I don’t know, I avoid it. I had a friend back in the school days who had a gender neutral name and honestly to this day I don’t know their true gender (moved around a lot as a kid so didn’t keep in touch with many people). Didn’t bother me. Just avoided gender specific terms. And this was way back before everybody decided to start claiming their genders. I have no problem with how people want to act or dress. But “gender” is a physical trait, not an aspect of your personality or opinion. You want to change it, feel free. But dont lie and say you’re something else just because you’re wearing a dress.
- writtenJ.N-Bucking wrote:
Rockster160 wrote:
J.N-Bucking wrote:
[quote from Rockster160]Given that response, would you care to explain hermafradites ?
Haha. That’s fair. In those (very rare) cases, I think whichever organs are functional should determine the “official” gender.
It’s up to them though. Like I said, people can do what they want. If you want to dress like boy and have people mistake you a boy, that’s fine. But if you’re not a boy, don’t go around trying to tell people you are, and don’t get mad when they don’t. (Goes for the opposite as well, obviously.)But yes, in the rare case of a *************hermaphrodite, to avoid confusion, they should be welcome to “choose”.
So the person born with both organs gets to choose (or most likely their parents do when they're a baby) and there's no telling that the selected ***sex would be the one the person identifies with, and if thats the case youve now got someone living in the wrong body.
So do they need to suffer or can they swap over?
Or if people have to stick with what they're born with should the hermafradite need to be male AND female forever, never feeling normal.
Since people are supposed to be either male OR female, and what you're born with is what you are, then hermafradites couldn't exist.
If we accept that they do indeed exist, and it was some sort of genetic mutation of the foetus that caused a person to have both organs, don't we then have no choice to accept that some sort of genetic issue (or any other issue in conception or gestation could not only cause a person to be born with BOTH, but be born with the WRONG ones?
The choice in this matter is because they ARE both. To avoid confusion/embarrassment. They are what they are, there is no denying that.
It IS a genetic mutation. Again, unalterable fact.
The term "wrong ones" used in this reference is used incorrectly, because it's used to cover an opinion. Gender is not opinion. It's a state. You can't change the color of your eyes or the color of your hair. You can dye your hair and put in different colored contacts, but that simply hides what they really are. Just like you can dress as the opposite gender. It doesn't actually change anything, it just hides the truth. I could say my eyes are the "wrong color". I can claim my eyes are golden or red all I want. I can get contacts that make them LOOK that color. But my eyes are, and forever will be, blue. Does that mean my eyes are the wrong color? No. It's not the color I want, sure. But they aren't "wrong". It's a state of reality, not a question of opinion.
(I love my eyes- just using eye color as example.)
- writtenJ.N-Bucking wrote:
Rockster160 wrote:
First off- disclaimer: I have no problem with anybody in the the LGBT or transgender community. I’ve got many friends in that area.Onto the main point: Gender is a scientific fact. Just like we’re born human. It’s not an opinion. Sorry- I don’t care how much you tell me otherwise, I will not accept the fact that because you “identify” as a toaster, I have to refer to you as one. If you’re not happy about that, then I’ll do my best to avoid “referring” to you in a similar manner, but I will not call you a toaster. (Unless it’s some sort of weird name-calling thing. In that case, it’s open range.)
Some people are born with “multiple personalities” in their head- they are still a single human being.
Gender is defined by your role in the reproduction dance. You are what your genitals say you are. If you get “the surgery” to switch, that’s fine. I’ll refer to you as such afterward.
Nothing wrong with dressing and acting how you want at all. Do that as much as you wish, but it does NOT change your gender. Gender is an attribute assigned at birth.
That said, I’m not opposed to the “gender-neutral” fashions of raising a kid. You should definitely still refer to them as he/she, based on their true birth gender. But let boys wear pink and play with Barbie and let girls play in the mud and play football.
People should be allowed to DO as they please, that’s fine. But nothing you say will change facts like your gender or your race.
Given that response, would you care to explain hermafradites ?
Haha. That’s fair. In those (very rare) cases, I think whichever organs are functional should determine the “official” gender.
It’s up to them though. Like I said, people can do what they want. If you want to dress like boy and have people mistake you a boy, that’s fine. But if you’re not a boy, don’t go around trying to tell people you are, and don’t get mad when they don’t. (Goes for the opposite as well, obviously.)
But yes, in the rare case of a *************hermaphrodite, to avoid confusion, they should be welcome to “choose”.
- writtenFirst off- disclaimer: I have no problem with anybody in the the LGBT or transgender community. I’ve got many friends in that area.
Onto the main point: Gender is a scientific fact. Just like we’re born human. It’s not an opinion. Sorry- I don’t care how much you tell me otherwise, I will not accept the fact that because you “identify” as a toaster, I have to refer to you as one. If you’re not happy about that, then I’ll do my best to avoid “referring” to you in a similar manner, but I will not call you a toaster. (Unless it’s some sort of weird name-calling thing. In that case, it’s open range.)
Some people are born with “multiple personalities” in their head- they are still a single human being.
Gender is defined by your role in the reproduction dance. You are what your genitals say you are. If you get “the surgery” to switch, that’s fine. I’ll refer to you as such afterward.
Nothing wrong with dressing and acting how you want at all. Do that as much as you wish, but it does NOT change your gender. Gender is an attribute assigned at birth.
That said, I’m not opposed to the “gender-neutral” fashions of raising a kid. You should definitely still refer to them as he/she, based on their true birth gender. But let boys wear pink and play with Barbie and let girls play in the mud and play football.
People should be allowed to DO as they please, that’s fine. But nothing you say will change facts like your gender or your race.
- writtenSherlock wrote:
I would have also switched to Apple except for glued in batteries, glued in memory chips and glued in hard drives.
Agreed. That's definitely a shame.
I try to get the better models to start, so upgrades aren't necessary, but to be honest, I've never had to buy one myself. 😅
That's the other issue with Apple- the price point is pretty significantly higher.
Given- the quality is higher too, but still.
Totally agree with you. I hate everything from Vista on.
Had my Desktop on XP for the longest time until one day I got on to find that they took control of my computer and did a force update. Wasn’t too stoked about that.
... That was pretty much the end of me being a Windows user. Slowly switched to a Mac and now there is no chance I’m going back. I’ve put an effort into using Windows, I’ve had to help people that use Windows so have learned how it works.... Still hate it. They’re progressing more and more into a touch screen focused experience and removing more and more customizations. It’s bad. =\
- writtenThat’s pretty common, actually. The reason you get more productive is because your brain is tired, which makes it harder for you to think about other things, which makes it easier to focus on one thing, which, in turn, makes you more productive.
I used to have the same issue (I’m ADHD), although it’s tamed down now. I never tried these personally- but you could try some of the Adderall type meds to help focus during the day?
At night, you need to pull yourself away from bright screens, small text, and lights in general for at least 30 minutes before going to bed. In those 30 minutes, make some tea, or warm milk and honey, or anything else that is relaxing but does not require your brain to be focusing on something.
- writtenAlso looks like the quotes get a little janky after a few levels of nesting. Need to fix that. 😄
- writtenHe wasn’t the one that brought down our old site. 😞
@Padre_J_Roulston would know the details better than I, but I believe they somehow got a database dump from right before it shut down.
Ryan and Padre worked together (I think) to set up HelpToGo since the original Help got shut down/sold by CNET.
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