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How can I help my mum?

Shes on sick from work for 2 months (stress). But she just sits on the laptop all day playing facebook games. She needs a new job but I think she is depressed.

Ive been thinking of opening a shop so she has something to focus on, and maybe she can help, but idk if she would. And i wouldnt be able to do it alone.

How can i help her?

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Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last four (4) days.
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thinking, idk, shop, focus, opening
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ProffVampy
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do you know why she became so stressed? was it something specific to do with work or is there something else going on in her life?

if she is infact depressed then it is defnitely worth seeking help for this from your doctor or even calling a mental health charity such as Mind or Samaritans so they can point you in the right direction for your area. if they just throw meds push for therapy too, theres often services you can self refer to which are usually pretty good.

opening a shop could be a lovely idea! something not too stressful for her but enables her to see people and get out into the world. what kind of shop are you considering?

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soco
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Depression is not rare, especially around this time of year. Refocusing her energies is good but long term she needs to visit her doctor and see what he/she diagnoses.

Help me with:

We have another hurricane coming this way.

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BuckingFastard(JN)
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Have you tried getting her to do anything?
Maybe suggest just getting out for a walk.
It's too easy getting stuck in a rut when you've not much to occupy the day

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
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The first step is to find her a competent doctor--and not the kind who would put someone on "stress leave" for two months or longer.

Her symptoms sound like classic depression. And, yes, until she gets involved with something, something on which she can focus, she will idle away her time with no resolution in sight.

But getting someone with depression to do something is like pushing a wet noodle uphill. She needs a competent doctor or psychiatrist to get to the root cause of her depression--and not just dispense pills.

Most doctors just want to get people out of their office as fast as possible. Find one who cares--and has the requisite knowledge to help.

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twosocks
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I think opening up a shop is risky in more than one way. For starters, are you going to be okay if it doesn't work out? Will that take a major financial toll on you?

I mean, it sounds like a great idea if all goes well. You would be making more money, your mother would have something to do. But what if she didn't like it? What if she wasn't a good employee? Could you fire her? Could you pay her a steady wage? Could you tolerate her that much? Just trying to help point out some possible pros and cons, if I'm coming off too negative that is.

Sherlock by olga tereshenko d9qdidc
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I agree with Twosocks: a lot of time and money invested, and your mother may not be interested in it at all.

And, generally, being in business with family members has more down sides than up sides!

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Shes stressed because of work and the bullying. I dont think shes depressed depressed, shes just pretty unwilling to do much apart from play games.

Shes on meds for menopause which are also used with depression, cant remember what theyre called though.

She wont go out for a walk, we have had a dog for 2 years and shes walked him (with my dad) about 5 times max, never alone.

Honestly im pretty excited about the shop. I found a great little shop up the street from a fancy dress place, then i found a unit right next to the fancy dress place. I mean, i think its my calling. The shop will be party supplies btw thats why the location is so great.

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Evansent
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Your Mum needs to be medically assessed. I understand how you would want to "improve her life" but she needs to do this for herself.
Two socks and Sherlock both share valid points.. Working with "family members" does not bode well.

I think it's a brilliant idea about the shop. You deserve to be happy. Go for it.

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ProffVampy
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Anonymous wrote:
Shes stressed because of work and the bullying. I dont think shes depressed depressed, shes just pretty unwilling to do much apart from play games.

Shes on meds for menopause which are also used with depression, cant remember what theyre called though.

She wont go out for a walk, we have had a dog for 2 years and shes walked him (with my dad) about 5 times max, never alone.

Honestly im pretty excited about the shop. I found a great little shop up the street from a fancy dress place, then i found a unit right next to the fancy dress place. I mean, i think its my calling. The shop will be party supplies btw thats why the location is so great.

in that case yes a change of scene work work may well do her good. depending how long shes been working for a few weeks off might be a welcome break for her especially when dealing with the menopause. have you talked to her about the shop? might be worth having a chat with her about it. id also say tel her youre worried, it might be that shes not feeling as bad as her behaviour would appear and she is just destressing and relaxing.

and well done on the location that would indeed be great! you might even be able to work out with the fancy dress shop some kind of deal where if customer use one shop they get 10% off at the other or something. help btoh fo you build up trade and such.

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Let her do her thing.
The games are a release of stress and once she's finished, I think she will gather herself up and do what needs to be done.

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Max
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Big-Al-One wrote:
Let her do her thing.
The games are a release of stress and once she's finished, I think she will gather herself up and do what needs to be done.

Best wishes. I have no answers. A trip or cruise my help a bit:)

A
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