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314sftf
Nix
last online: 11/28, 9:31
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I got what I wanted.

A puppy. And it’s hard work. But I feel like I can’t talk about it and ask for support because it’s what I wanted. I’m not supposed to think it’s hard.

Every time I ask for support I get ‘shall I take him back to the breeder?’

I’m exhausted. I just want someone to tell me I’m doing good and not that I’m not spending enough time with the other dog. Or that I need to do more, or this, or that.

I knew it would be hard. But nothing great comes easy. But my family seem to just want me to quit. It’s always been like that. Idk why I thought this would be different.

I just need positive vibes right now.

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time, hard, wanted, support, vibes
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Happy earth
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last online: 11/26, 18:47
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Unsupportive family sucks.

Puppies are a lot of hard work. I'm sure you're giving the pup all it needs. Do you have a photo of your new baby?

T7oab4
Kalinihta
last online: 02/03, 11:07
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I don't know if you're doing a good job. all I know from my interaction with dogs is that it will get better, easier with time. right now you need to give your best and later on it will be very easy to take care of him/her. remember, what he/she learns now, will be forever.
so, off course you need to spend more time with the puppy than with the older one.
just believe in yourself, you're doing the best you can, don't wait for others to confirm this. when the dog is behaving the way he/she should, that's your confirmation.

Yorick
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last online: 02/28, 23:53
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i often wonder if ya let loose with no dicipline will the puppy turn into a selfish animal or if it must be trained till it reaches adulthood? not a pet expert here.. but i can tell how other peoples pet behave tho just dunno if they were trained or they are a reflection of the owner?

Bejbybird
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last online: 08/21, 7:48
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Aaaw, Nix, so pleased you have got the puppy! Congratulations xx I can imagine it to be a hard work! I work with kids and when my bunny was a baby bunny she was harder work then looking after a baby - I was drained! Literally, she could not stay unsupervised for one minute.

I don't know much about dogs though, but I am sure you are doing all you can! Hope your family will be more supportive (but can imagine my mother being like yours if i got a puppy!). Put some dog comedies on to cheer you up..and wish you all the energy, wisdom, love and perseverance that you need xx

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Kalinihta
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NaCtHoMaN wrote:
i often wonder if ya let loose with no dicipline will the puppy turn into a selfish animal or if it must be trained till it reaches adulthood? not a pet expert here.. but i can tell how other peoples pet behave tho just dunno if they were trained or they are a reflection of the owner?

a little bit of both I think. trainers often say that you can only teach dogs when they are puppies. but that's not true. sure it's a lot easier to teach them while puppies, but I've had many dogs trained in adulthood even though they were stray, feral or abandoned. if you let loose, they'll surely learn a lot from the owner, and they'll start having similar to the owner, characteristics, but they'll also start thinking they live in a pack and behave hierarchically. I'm not sure I've answered your question!

Yorick
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you answered it beautifully

D
DragonLady
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I once found an abandoned litter of 13 brand new puppies, and had to bottle feed all of them every two hours for over a month.

We call it "puppy Christmas" and it was one of the hardest things I've ever done.

My family was very supportive, and a LOT of people helped. But a few others said things that really hurt, and I broke off one friendship over it.

Just hang in there; they do grow very quickly, and really do want you to be happy with them, so they start settling down after a few months.

Help me with:

Help me...find some new websites with interesting content to hang out on.

314sftf
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Nix
last online: 11/28, 9:31
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NaCtHoMaN wrote:
i often wonder if ya let loose with no dicipline will the puppy turn into a selfish animal or if it must be trained till it reaches adulthood? not a pet expert here.. but i can tell how other peoples pet behave tho just dunno if they were trained or they are a reflection of the owner?

the fundamental rule with dogs, and any animals for that matter, is they do what works. Every interaction has one of 4 outcomes, positive reinforcement, negative reinforcement, positive punishment and negative punishment. All of these outcomes teach a dog and influence future behaviour.

If you let loose, the dog will make up its own rules based on its experiences. But theres no real way of saying what those rules would be, since there are so many factors, its really a nature vs nurture debate, but both are factors. Even the care of the mother while pregnant influences future behaviour.

Anyway, you can teach an old dog new tricks. But its VERY hard to begin socialisation later in life. Anything a dog experiences in the first few months of life is accepted, anything after that is met with caution.

I already have a rescue dog who was not socialised early in life and I'm still trying to fix that. But I think he will always be an anxious/fearful dog unfortunately. He was from excellent breeders so I would say its down to early life experiences in the previous home.

Sorry I rambled a bit there...

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Aria
last online: 03/16, 22:34
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I'm in the same boat at the moment! My eldest dog, almost 10, seemed to be like a breeze when I got him as a puppy. It flew by so fast and he's the calmest, smartest and sweetest dog that apparently is loved by everyone who comes to visit. My mom even calls him her grandson.

Three weeks ago, I got a Husky mix - a far cry from the traits and characteristics of my Golden Retriever. He's 10 weeks old and has managed in 21 days, to turn my nice, neat clean home into something that looks like it was raided by and anti-terrorist unit. I've had to replace my new brand new quilt, my teddy bears are in witness protection and every morning, I had to play the fantastic game of What Have I Stepped In Today?

He's now just realized that "no" means he gets to run away with whatever he has in his mouth, or that it's an invitation to attempt removing my nose or finger with his teeth.

Surely my oldest wasn't that bad?! He probably was. In fact I remember that he took out an entire sofa by the time he was 6 months old and I probably went through about 50-something packets of 6 toilet paper rolls by the time he was properly housebroken.

It's exhausting, it can leave me frustrated, losing sleep and even being woken up by an excitable pup jumping on my head at 6AM (if I'm lucky for it to be that close to sunrise). I haven't yet broken down in tears, but I know it's going to happen at some point.

You're doing fine. I promise. You care and that shows that you're not failing. It's hard work. They're like toddlers without the inability to communicate. But it will get better. I promise!

You didn't say how old the puppy was, but could you look into what's called "puppy pre-schools" in your area? Here in Australia, they do them through various vet clinics when the pup is between 8-16 weeks. It goes for about 4-6 weeks and the puppy socializes within the grounds with other puppies and their owners, you can learn how to focus on housebreaking and some "problem" areas that you might find some advice for. My Eli starts his this coming Thursday night and I'm looking for a solution to his nibbling problem. He definitely has his bite inhibition, but it only kicks in AFTER his teeth are around what it is he's hurting. Well, that, and he seems to think that his "older brother" is also a chew toy and is constantly trying to pull folds of skin.

It definitely is a tiring time in our house.

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Aria
last online: 03/16, 22:34
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Aria wrote:
I'm in the same boat at the moment! My eldest dog, almost 10, seemed to be like a breeze when I got him as a puppy. It flew by so fast and he's the calmest, smartest and sweetest dog that apparently is loved by everyone who comes to visit. My mom even calls him her grandson.

Three weeks ago, I got a Husky mix - a far cry from the traits and characteristics of my Golden Retriever. He's 10 weeks old and has managed in 21 days, to turn my nice, neat, clean home into something that looks like it was raided by an anti-terrorist unit. I've had to replace my new brand new quilt, my teddy bears are in witness protection and every morning, I had to play the fantastic game of What Have I Stepped In Today?

He's now just realized that "no" means he gets to run away with whatever he has in his mouth, or that it's an invitation to attempt removing my nose or finger with his teeth.

Surely my oldest wasn't that bad?! He probably was. In fact I remember that he took out an entire sofa by the time he was 6 months old and I probably went through about 50-something packets of 6 toilet paper rolls by the time he was properly housebroken.

It's exhausting, it can leave me frustrated, losing sleep and even being woken up by an excitable pup jumping on my head at 6AM (if I'm lucky for it to be that close to sunrise). I haven't yet broken down in tears, but I know it's going to happen at some point.

You're doing fine. I promise. You care and that shows that you're not failing. It's hard work. They're like toddlers without the inability to communicate. But it will get better. I promise!

You didn't say how old the puppy was, but could you look into what's called "puppy pre-schools" in your area? Here in Australia, they do them through various vet clinics when the pup is between 8-16 weeks. It goes for about 4-6 weeks and the puppy socializes within the grounds with other puppies and their owners, you can learn how to focus on housebreaking and some "problem" areas that you might find some advice for. My Eli starts his this coming Thursday night and I'm looking for a solution to his nibbling problem. He definitely has his bite inhibition, but it only kicks in AFTER his teeth are around what it is he's hurting. Well, that, and he seems to think that his "older brother" is also a chew toy and is constantly trying to pull folds of skin.

It definitely is a tiring time in our house.

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Aria
last online: 03/16, 22:34
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Crap! That was supposed to be an edit. Oops!

314sftf
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Nix
last online: 11/28, 9:31
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Thanks aria. He is 12 weeks this week. He’s getting better. He had a dry night last night! I think he might have had a UTI since he was peeing so much.

We are enrolled in puppy class which starts September.

I’ve been ill and had no sleep it’s just getting to me and I’m questioning my ability as a dog trainer.

Bejbybird
Mya
last online: 08/21, 7:48
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Nix wrote:

I’ve been ill and had no sleep it’s just getting to me and I’m questioning my ability as a dog trainer.

Aaw, don't! I had a period when I coudn't stand my own daughter, and with my last nanny kids there were times when I could strangle them. As most of the time we were in public, all the people saw how I was struggling with them, and about 3 weeks before I finished my job, I had a mental breakdown at work and cried for an hour in public..

We have our limits, and being physically & mentally exhausted can make us doubt ourselves, or break us, but it gets better; believe..! Hope you will be able to get some rest and feel better soon, Nix. What's the puppy's name?

314sftf
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Nix
last online: 11/28, 9:31
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Mya wrote:

Nix wrote:

I’ve been ill and had no sleep it’s just getting to me and I’m questioning my ability as a dog trainer.

Aaw, don't! I had a period when I coudn't stand my own daughter, and with my last nanny kids there were times when I could strangle them. As most of the time we were in public, all the people saw how I was struggling with them, and about 3 weeks before I finished my job, I had a mental breakdown at work and cried for an hour in public..

We have our limits, and being physically & mentally exhausted can make us doubt ourselves, or break us, but it gets better; believe..! Hope you will be able to get some rest and feel better soon, Nix. What's the puppy's name?

His name is Rio

https://imgur.com/a/t6dlGRe

D
DragonLady
last online: <time class="timeago" datetime="1713901227" title="Apr 23, 2024 19:40">Apr 23, 2024 19:40</time>
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He's adorable! :D

Help me with:

Help me...find some new websites with interesting content to hang out on.

Happy earth
smiley
last online: 11/26, 18:47
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He looks very curious, intelligent, and eager to please.

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verge
last online: 03/08, 18:09
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Eventually your pup will totally help balance your feelings more positively. Generally, the more walks you go for, the better both of you will feel.

A
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