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262 replies, Replies 81 to 90

How can I help my mum?

Anonymous wrote:
Shes stressed because of work and the bullying. I dont think shes depressed depressed, shes just pretty unwilling to do much apart from play games.

Shes on meds for menopause which are also used with depression, cant remember what theyre called though.

She wont go out for a walk, we have had a dog for 2 years and shes walked him (with my dad) about 5 times max, never alone.

Honestly im pretty excited about the shop. I found a great little shop up the street from a fancy dress place, then i found a unit right next to the fancy dress place. I mean, i think its my calling. The shop will be party supplies btw thats why the location is so great.

in that case yes a change of scene work work may well do her good. depending how long shes been working for a few weeks off might be a welcome break for her especially when dealing with the menopause. have you talked to her about the shop? might be worth having a chat with her about it. id also say tel her youre worried, it might be that shes not feeling as bad as her behaviour would appear and she is just destressing and relaxing.

and well done on the location that would indeed be great! you might even be able to work out with the fancy dress shop some kind of deal where if customer use one shop they get 10% off at the other or something. help btoh fo you build up trade and such.

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How can I help my mum?

do you know why she became so stressed? was it something specific to do with work or is there something else going on in her life?

if she is infact depressed then it is defnitely worth seeking help for this from your doctor or even calling a mental health charity such as Mind or Samaritans so they can point you in the right direction for your area. if they just throw meds push for therapy too, theres often services you can self refer to which are usually pretty good.

opening a shop could be a lovely idea! something not too stressful for her but enables her to see people and get out into the world. what kind of shop are you considering?

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Wishes.

Whats up? We all have wishes and dreams! not all attainable...i wish i could be a famous comedian however it is very unlikely this will come true.

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The movie help dot com is coming to a theatre near you.

hmm...i think margot robbie...she can do the proff and the vampy side i feel xD

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safer way to find roommates than craigslist?

ive always used spareroom as pepper suggested! or yeh local facebook pages or roommates :)

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Why am I always ignored on facebook?

i dont get much response on facebook apart from likes which dont really mean much though they feel so important in a modern world! or one of my friends will tag me in the odd thing. i mostly use it to store all the photos of my drunk nights in town >.>

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I have been on this site for a long time!

the site is only young again. for how long this one has been up and running i would say we are doing amazingly well. its clearly an active site from all the posts which is good for when people come browsing through :)

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I was once married.

we do indeed all have mental health whether poor or good. its a spectrum. actually part of the workshops i run explains it really well but it wouldnt be easy to type out...
and if my cat does know when im in a bad mood he clearly doesnt care xD he usually just avoids me more than usual and sleeps on his chair. hes a little bugger but i love him.

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I was once married.

PepperJ wrote:

ProffVampy wrote:

PepperJ wrote:
I have been married for nearly 18 years. It's not a piece of cake and it hasn't always been happy.

He's my 2nd husband. I was married to my 1st for 3 years, but he was gay/bisexual and "still in the closet" while we were married.

I have never really been single. I've always had a serious boyfriend/marriage. I feel like I missed out by not having some fully single years....

im in that boat at the moment pepper! this is the first time i have ever been single for more than a few months. just been lond term boyfriends and then my recent hiccup. i dont really know what to do with myself and im not enjoying it as much as everyone else seems to!

i also suffer with mental health issues at especially over the christmas period its really played on my mind and been getting to me how lonely its making me feel. The cat doesnt quite provide the same support as a partner would! xD my family and friends say i should just enjoy it and chill out but its just so alien i dont really know how!

I feel like I was relentlessly pursued. I was too nice and would never say "back off," and would therefore end up in relationships. And once I was in the relationships, I would let the guys do things for me... so then I became sort of dependent in a way (??)

Anyway, I am older now, and I would really like to be alone for a while. NOT that I don't love my husb. Just that I have never "done that" before.

That aside, I am perfectly comfortable with myself. I have lots of things that I can do that occupy my time and energy. As long as I don't fall into a depression.

However, the sad part is that I feel like I might fall into a depression without the husb and kids who need me every day.

i was the complete opposite, i wasnt chased or persued so as soon as someone actually took interest i jumped at it! ahh young innocent me...though actually i still find i do that as with the most recent one. in my mind im still the weird unattractive one which limits me in my efforts alot and i usually end up settling.

I think id be much more likely to slip back into a deep depression if i didnt have my cat to be looking after. the fact that someones depending on your makes a difference and isnt something i had before so i can tell hes making a diffference. i mean i feel myself teetering on the edge at the moment which is why im taking steps to avoid it and so glad this site is back in everyones lives! but i'll happily live for my kitty after all its me and him against the world!

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I was once married.

Sherlock wrote:

ProffVampy wrote:
im in that boat at the moment pepper! this is the first time i have ever been single for more than a few months. just been lond term boyfriends and then my recent hiccup. i dont really know what to do with myself and im not enjoying it as much as everyone else seems to!

i also suffer with mental health issues at especially over the christmas period its really played on my mind and been getting to me how lonely its making me feel. The cat doesnt quite provide the same support as a partner would! xD my family and friends say i should just enjoy it and chill out but its just so alien i dont really know how!

Christmas is hard on a lot of people. It's supposed to be a season of love and giving. But a lot of people are left out in the cold, literally.
I was reading about narcissistic parents on another blog, and how there would be one sibling who was treated completely different from the others--and that sibling's children would be treated differently than all the other sibling's children, i.e., one grandchild would get two presents and the others would get 20 - 30. One grown woman got a present of something like 20 empty paper rolls from her mother, while the other grown children received gifts of real value. Strange, indeed.

Cats can teach us a lot about living. Cats understand the difference between loneliness and solitude. And they know the importance of getting enough rest!

And it is better to be without a "partner" for a while than to be with the wrong partner. I would deduce that approximately 70% of people are not good "partner material," being either too selfish, too immature or possessed of some fatal character flaws, e.g., disloyalty, dishonesty, addiction, etc.

Again, the 50% divorce rate says a lot!

christmas is the time of year with the highest suicides and self harming rates which doesnt surprise me. if it haddnt been for cliche teenage testing that couldve been me but i know better and im far too logical to get myself into that state. joys of learning all the coping strategies when i had my therapy!

and my cats a lil weirdo, i love him all the world but hes no normal cat. but i love having him here because even if hes asleep in the other room it does just stop me from feeling completely alone :) if i call him or shake his treats i know he'll come running to me :3

and yeh theres alot of people who are bad partners but maybe thats just for me? i like to think im decent xD everyones always said ive treated my boyfriends like kings which ill take as a good thing. though being able to cook seems to be half the battle! hehe

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